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Stress-Relief and Inspiration Blog

 
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The Grandest Version of Ourselves

By Dr. Darcy Lord - Wednesday, June 21, 2017

What if I were so filled up with my own passion, purpose and genuine power that I didn’t have time or interest in criticizing you or anyone else? What if the love and appreciation that I had flowing through me right now were so big and so constant that I could view everything and everyone with eyes of compassion, possibility and wonder? What if I were so busy finding ways I could uplift that I forgot to rail against groups and organizations behaving badly? What if I decided to walk my own path so clearly and boldly that I knew everyone else could do it too? What if I practiced trusting that still small voice within so much that I felt the divine presence of well-being even while things seemed so fast and chaotic? And what if you did it too?

I think we can do it. I think it’s actually possible. But somehow we learned to wait. Wait until we are more ready; wait until others tell us we are good enough; wait until people are nicer and the world is more ethical; wait until we graduate, get a different job, get married, get the house, retire, elect the right government officials. Mostly I think we are waiting around for everyone else to do it too. Or just someone. Anyone. To do what? To focus on being the grandest version of themselves that is possible in this very moment.

What do you think it would look like if a few of us started doing that right now? If we started being the grandest version of ourselves that we know to be? Right now with the imperfect, messy work situations, relationships, finances and bodies that we have in this moment? Right now in the stressed out, relief seeking culture we live in? Right now when we don’t have time to do anything more? I want us to choose to do just that, to live the grandest version of ourselves that we can. Because I think amazing things will happen when we do. And we will laugh and love more. And we will start a ripple effect of good that can help heal the planet. And we will surprise ourselves with our own inner goodness and beauty.

If it feels too big and vague to say, “I’m going to start being the grandest version of myself that I can be,” then here is a wonderful way to put it into motion. This is your provocation for the week. Choose a quality or essence that resonates with the grandest version of you that you can imagine. It might be love, strength, laughter, gentleness, discipline, patience, compassion, appreciation, persistence, joyfulness, honor, etc. There are so many so just choose one that seems to be calling to you right now. Intend to embody that quality so fully that you experience it all week—within your thoughts, your feelings, your heart and your actions. Each time you find yourself feeling tired, squished up, frustrated, drained or “out of sorts” imagine this quality flooding through your entire being. Feel the essence of your grandest version as it begins to flow through your daily experiences.

The reason I know it’s possible to begin living as our grandest selves is that I have experienced people practicing it. I have watched some of them, read their work, run into them at the store, listened to their music and been inspired by their words or actions. I have been assisted by them and blessed by them in countless beautiful ways. And I believe with all of my heart that their ranks are growing. So this week be on the lookout for those who are practicing their grandest version; feel for them; hope to see them; expect to find them. And more importantly, let’s choose in this moment to join them, to be them. Ah, the power of returning to our grandest version!

 

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Trying Less

By Dr. Darcy Lord - Wednesday, June 14, 2017

I think we try too much. Too hard, too often, too much. We even try to relax. The word “trying” conjures up a certain picture for me which feels very different from things like ease, strength, simplicity, clarity, power and focus. Do you ever notice that sometimes “trying” can feel like heavy, endless effort…because if you are still trying to do something then you obviously haven’t succeeded?

I want us all to try less. And live more. And breathe more. I think kids and animals do this really well. Instead of “trying” they are either doing something—with commitment, passion, intensity and often humor, or they are not doing—such as basking in a sunny afternoon nap, or sleeping peacefully through the night. Either way, they are doing what they are doing­ – fully.

When I say I want us to try less it can sound like I am promoting non-productive, “lazy” or irresponsible behaviors. The opposite is true really. One of my favorite things is knowing with certainty that every one of us, no matter our age or experience, is continually being called to live a life of great purpose, and that when we do we make beautiful, positive changes for our world. For that to happen we have to have our physical, emotional and spiritual “tanks” full. We need to feel a sense of buoyancy and resiliency; we need to have our inner convictions primed and ready for action and non-action.

But when we are always “trying” so hard, with almost everything in our life, it can squish us up until we feel exhausted on every level. When that happens we don’t have access to what we really need for action: passion, strength and intensity; nor do we have access to what allows for true non-action: peace, stillness, clarity. And of course, it is both sides that we need in order to live radiantly, truly as our highest and best. We need the power and strength of fully doing and the relaxation and ease of fully notdoing. “Trying” puts us right in the middle where we don’t have access to either side: the effort needed for meaningful action or the enjoyment of surrender and respite.

This week your provocation is the “Art of Trying Less.” Try less to get the entire To-Do List finished; try less to be all things to all people; try less to do too much with too little time and energy; try less to cover your own greatness in order for others to be more comfortable around you. When you feel yourself using an effort that is draining you instead of empowering you, stop for a moment. Imagine that you can breathe slowly in and out through your heart. Do it until any feeling of “trying,” of tightness, stagnancy, pressure, littleness, or tiredness begins to melt away. Then decide from the truest part of you if it is time for full, committed, decisive effort and action; or if it is time for true, happy basking, release and respite. Choose one side or the other. Choose simply. Choose without guilt. Choose other than “trying.” I think it was Yoda on Stars Wars who said, “Try? There is no try. You either do or you don’t do.”

And as you choose this week keep remembering how beautiful and good you and your life are, no matter your current circumstances.

 

 

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The Difficult Art of Self-Forgiveness

By Dr. Darcy Lord - Tuesday, May 30, 2017

I was thinking about forgiveness. Whether we practice it or not, most of us have heard of the importance and benefits of forgiving people. It’s not about liking or condoning negative, abusive or unhealthy behavior; it’s simply about forgiving the person because it doesn’t serve us (or anyone) to hold onto the hurt and judgment. Most counseling practices, spiritual traditions, universal philosophies, and personal growth processes eventually lead us back to the art of forgiving. But sometimes I think we go about it backwards.  

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Personal Mission Statements

By Dr. Darcy Lord - Wednesday, May 24, 2017

I wonder what would happen if we all created a personal mission statement for our lives. And then chose to remember it throughout the day even at work or with the kids. I wonder if we would feel as frantic, stressed, worried or bored? I wonder if we would still move through the days on autopilot as so many of us often do? What would your mission statement be about?  

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Life is Good and is Always For Us

By Dr. Darcy Lord - Saturday, April 08, 2017

I know I can be Pollyanna. I like that about me. I like that it feels true to the very core of my being that good is possible, positive change is possible, healing is possible, love is possible. In all situations, at all junctures, good is. I know we don’t always act on it and I know that many people are hurting. I do know that. And at the same time the possibility to experience good at any moment, on many different levels, is always present. 

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One Little Choice

By Dr. Darcy Lord - Saturday, April 08, 2017

I often think about how glad I am to know beyond a shadow of a doubt that change is possible. Not always easy. Rarely easy, as a matter of fact. But always possible. I have been playing around with this consciousness "stuff" for a long time now, over two decades. I am getting clearer and clearer about something. It’s not when the change is coming the easiest that the real transformation happens. Instead, it’s when you want to give up, or cave, or forget it all, or start again tomorrow that the real possibility opens up to step into strength and real power to make changes.  

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This Moment

By Dr. Darcy Lord - Saturday, April 08, 2017

What if this very moment were enough? What if it was already good enough to enjoy? What if you took the time, intention and choice to notice it fully and even enjoy it? What might happen in your life if you did that once today—or twice—or twenty or more times, until it became a habit? My habit up until this point has often been different from that. I have become aware that I am almost always focusing on getting somewhere else. So often throughout my day I am trying to finish something, only so that I am able to move on to the next thing, in order to complete it, to move on to something else, to finish it… and on and on. 

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About the Author

Blogger Dr. Darcy Lord

Dr. Darcy Lord received her Ph.D. from The Ohio State University in Somatic Education which addresses the mind-body-spirit connection. She has been a speaker, trainer, and consultant for over twenty-five years, guiding groups and individuals toward their own empowerment and well-being. Book Darcy Today!